My wife can be found in front of the TV in her downtime. One of the shows she enjoys watching is Kocktails with Khloé, Khloé Kardashian’s talk show. One particular episode Amps had me catch a bit of featured Kendra Wilkinson, Trey Songz and (inexplicably) Pauly Shore. I was not ready.
The show ran pleasantly enough, including a very sensual bit where Trey was asked to demonstrate how he makes the ladies feel special. Then, the show went downhill very fast. Shore was invited to join the rest of the guests on the couch, but really, he should have been invited to join the rest of the guests in the twenty-first century, because he seemed to harp on the fact that Khloé, her mother, and several of her sisters often date black men. It was a very awkward, very ugly several minutes, during which Trey got up and left the set. Honestly, I couldn’t blame him. I ended up leaving the room myself. I think Shore’s fascination with the Kardashians’ dating preferences is symptomatic of a larger problem, and it isn’t one that only affects white men. I know because I’ve dealt with something similar.
As a younger, single man, I often felt twinges of anger when I saw attractive black women on the arms of white men. For many years, though I would never admit it to myself, let alone out loud, I had a problem with sisters dating outside the race. Being the filthy hypocrite I was, I was perfectly fine with brothers doing it. I’d been attracted to, dated, and even slept with white women myself. But God forbid a black woman in America exercise her freedom and choose who she dates! As I entered my late twenties, however, I had an epiphany: it was none of my f**king business.
The real reason I had a problem with black women dating interracially boiled down to one simple fact – I was jealous. Seeing beautiful women of color giving their time to white men made me feel inadequate, especially since I was having such a hard time maintaining relationships of substance myself. So instead asking what it was about me that caused this never-ending cycle of toxic relationships, I chose to project my frustration on people whose only crime was choosing to be happy. I eventually broke the cycle, and my petty bigotries went with it. Now I’m a father to a beautiful little black girl, and one day she may bring home a young white man. It will not be for me approve or disapprove of him based on the color of his skin. My only criterion is that they make each other happy.
What do you think, Alarmers? Leave your comments below.